We’re Moving to Canada
When we began our tenure in Singapore in January of 2017 I had not spent more than three years in one place since prior to 2008. We referred to it as “the curse” and wondered if Singapore would break it. Eight years later we are nine years into marriage, three children into family, and thankful to God for much grace and provision as we say goodbye to Singapore and relocate to Canada. We are moving, I am moving again, but I do believe the curse is broken. For those to whom we say goodbye, some brief reflections on our time in Singapore are in order.
I was not aware at the time how much I hoped Singapore would become my home. I have a peculiar interest in foreign places and peoples due (probably) to a less than ideal upbringing in my native Australia. At one level Singapore disappointed me, because it did not become my home. At another level Singapore did all that it could do, and my grasp of “home” is a little better than it was as a result of the journey. My attention was gradually turned from home to household as the Lord gave me to understand that I was now the head of one, and continued to populate it. It has been a singlular joy and blessing to become a husband and a father. Singapore will always have a warm place in my memory and heart as the place where I received these profound gifts.
Singapore has also been the place I have spent the longest time in Christian ministry. At this point in the forefront of my mind is the simple affection brothers and sisters we worshipped with for the last eight years showed to one another. And this strikes me because it was the very thing I noticed about my first church in 2013 (in Melbourne, Australia).
A dear auntie even gave me (after much thought) a Chinese name. I was looking for an improvement on the one my children had given me: 大猪. Could she have known I was looking for home in Singapore? Not likely.
Before Christ I worked in the live music industry. I have always remembered a bit of encouragement someone gave me once before performing in a high pressure situation. “Everyone wants you to do well,” this person said to me. It struck me as not the most obvious thing to say. But as I thought about it, I did have a fear somewhere inside me that people were watching and waiting for me to make a mistake. Unfortunately, sometimes, ministry staff watch each other like this. There is a tendency to be critical ad nauseam in the name of improvement. This can be argued. But it can also create in us a critical spirit.
I can not think of a single time I thought the members of our church were waiting for me to make a mistake. I made the mistakes despite this, but that is a separate point! I have been consistently heartened by the encouraging spirit of my brothers and sisters in Singapore. This has been a gift to me that I intend to pay forward. I am far too quick to criticise. But I long to encourage others with the encouragement that I have received. It is only fair.
It is hard to come away from Singapore and not be reflecting on our approach to time. “Pace of life” is often thrown around without further elaboration. But life is too fast in Singapore. At one point I noticed that there just wasn’t any time in between things. And this is a problem because the important things of life often happen in between things. What if there is no more in between? Fathers (and many mothers) have no time in between waking and working. Children have no time in between school and extracurricula commitments. Parents have no time in between work and sleep in the evening. In Singapore we seem to race from commitment to commitment, jumping clear over the in betweens, where much of the best action is.
The church is not immune to this. In the worst cases the church only baptises haste. Sundays, mid-week Bible studies, mid-week training for Bible studies, prayer meetings, church camps, staff retreats, and I could go on. Are any of these bad in isolation? I don’t think so (certainly not the first one). But what if they are all tossed into a salad bowl called the calendar year?
I have lost sight of people, the simplicity of loving the person next to or in front of me, praying for them, ecouraging them, remembering them, too many times in the haste of Singaporean life. And I regret this. I makes me wonder. What are the reps I have been doing in ministry? What are the runs I have been putting on the board? What are the things I (consciously or not) count? Is it the number of ministry tasks I accomplish in a day? Is it the number or people who turn up to events? Is the number of churches we plant? Is it the number of leaders we raise up?
I should have been counting the people I have loved and encouraged. Not because this would validate me, but because loving people is what really counts. Ministry reps in the future must be people loved and encouraged.
Some friends may be wondering why we are willing to leave Singapore at this stage of life, with three children, and why Canada? But this will have to wait for another post. Tomorrow we will gather together one last time, for a while at least, with our brothers and sisters. We are thankful knowing they are in our Father’s hands, and they walk in the light in the days of the great King. We will slip away, rejoicing and giving thanks, with more than one glance at what has been a homely house for us, for a time.
One Response
Dear Dan – we will miss you greatly and look back on your days with us with fondness. We hope you will look back on your days with us with fondness, both as a member and when on staff. I’m sorry that you felt the way you did, even if we don’t all feel the same. Nonetheless, as you said, let us thankfully walk in the light in the days of our great King!